Dads not being allowed in….

[Taylor5]

No the recovery area is far too busy and off the beaten track seemed to be turning loads of corners…. it felt like a space in a corridor to be honest.. Only 1 nurse and she was very busy i was vomiting and the two others there were very old and sick…. not a place you would want a baby to be in…..
on ds1 i wasnt put into recovery as it was nearly 2 hours after the birth by the time they were finished, so I was just watched in the little room beside the theatre so i had ds with me, he was hours waiting for a feed and was in a lttle thing to heat him up….
Second time dh and babs sent to the ward ahead ofme and i was finished up and move to the recovery area…

[scole1]

i had ds1 for a bit as was in mlu, but then went to surgery butwas gone for 3.5 hours long time without baby i was distraught, i think recovery was in a corridor without other people iykwim, then this time round on ds2 i was in a general room, for 1.5hrs, again without baby….do think it’s a long time without baby and also for the dads to be left helpless iykwim….hope this improves

[wendygeraghty]

hi all im due in april and my husband wasnt allowed in for the scan at 23 weeks . He had taken off work early and everything. I found it upsetting as the last time i was in hospital for a scan i had had a miscarriage which was very upsetting for both of us but i was glad he was there. It would have been really nice to have him there for this one as it was so clear on the screen but when the pic is printed out its very hard to make out anything

[Muso]

This is a total disgrace, and I’ll be emailing those addresses asap. I cannot imagine what they hope this will achieve 🙁

I spent 1 hour in recovery following c-sect, and yes I seem to remember it being a corridor too. The guy in the next bed, got very agitated when the drugs started to wear off and started pulling his iv’s out- it was very unnerving- and I remember thinking it was not the place for a baby anyway. It was also freezing.

I had asked in advance on their policy during recovery, so knew babs would not be there. Thankfully, the mw allowed me skin to skin while in theatre, which made all the difference to my mental state, and our bf experience- she did take a bit of persuading however, but if you’re having an elective, make sure you ask for this before you go down.

And what about c-sections? Are fathers allowed in then?

[scole1]

oh really muso you lucky thing….ds2 was shown to me over the screen, wrapped shown again then taken out…dh was in for a total of 6mins, i sat in a room before going into the operating room by myself as they had to clean the OR from previous surgery, i sat there in tears terrified while dh was told to wait outside while they preped him and told him what would happen…..
they brought him in just as incision was being made, then once baby out they brought him to baby and then led out, on the up he saw baby being weighed and checked and wrapped, they did get pics of him with baby outside, while i listened to baby’s cry and him giggling with the nurse and they joy of everything being ok…but I missed out on that, god forbid if anything were to have gone wrong thankfully didn’t i didn’t have any time with babs at all…..
i didn’t like the whole section thing as it was far to detatched from whole experience but i knew before that what would happen as i knew needed a section….i felt helpless and empty and totally alone….
i’ve had my 2 now and i mentally don’t think i could go through it again i was scared enough with the thoughts thinking i would die, and being that worked up all alone and then in there with medical team i needed oxygen to calm me down if dh had been there to hold my hand or even smile to reassure me i think i wouldn’t have been so panicky……
giving birth being pregnant it’s an unkown territory no matter howmany times you do it or what ever the result to have someone there that is your comfort in one of the most life changing events is detrimental and to have this taken away from you it’s not any good to that of the mental health of the mother…you may have the medical team around you but without that someone you know there you are alone, no matter what…and you are in a vunrable state you just cannot be alone…no matter how confident or whatever you are…

[beams]

I remember on both my sections dh was allowed in at the last minute just as consultant made the incision – i was panicking big time – kept asking for dh as was worried they had forgotten about him – i clung to his hand when he was finally allowed in and just asked him to talk to me to keep my mind off what was happening – think he was telling me all about the sopranos he had watched the night before 😆 😆 i wouldnt have been able to get through it without him – as scole says each birthing experience is different and you need the comfort of your partner with you – its vital 😀

[Taylor5]

On ds1 dh was only in as they were opening me up… but on ds2 they were waiting for me dh had gone to get ready so we both arrived at the theatre at the same time *(me in a wheelchair)
So dh was there for the epidural and the was there when they were cutting me…. which i could feel in one area, i scared the shit out of them… it was the drainage tube going into my belly I could feel that cut, but at the time i thought it was the section cut…..
I had major trauma on ds1, had a very serious bleed that took nearly 2 hours to stop, 2 understudies and 2 senior consultants 1.40 mins… dh was thrown out with ds very very suddenly, they told me nothing and the panic that was going on around me frightened the crap out of me…. I told them I didnt want blood but the doctor told me its almost a life or death suitation… I told him if he didnt get around her and tell me what the fuck was going on I’d kick him if i could move my legs 🙄 😆 😆 😆 After he explained what was going on i was okay but hte being kept in the dark was horrible and then the 3 doctors each giving their oppion why they should or shouldnt remove my womb…. thank God Dr Rabbie was there and saved it….. It was the most horrid moments of my life, kinda out of body in a way! Think that has alot to do with my pnd…. i would say i suffered from post traumatic stress..

Second section dh was with me, the doctors knew how rough things were the first time so when it was just a reptured placenta and a small panic we all settled down i had dh and the midwife at my shoulders, i got to see ds2 then i got to cuddle him for about 5 mins before both dh and ds were taken away… they were with me for ages as dh said he wanted to make sure there was no bleed before he went to the ward, the doctors were great and said okay all is looking good safe for you to go.. i was so relaxed this time, the midwife was at my shoulders and holding my hand…… both sections like chawlk and cheese! But thank God i had dh close on both times… first time i could see dh and ds1 through the glass into the room next door… dh was blowing me kisses and i could hear ds1…. I would have gotten off the table if he wasnt there 😆 😆 😆

[Taylor5]

hi all im due in april and my husband wasnt allowed in for thescan at 23 weeks . He had taken off work early and everything. I found it upsetting as the last time i was in hospital for a scan i had had a miscarriage which was very upsetting for both of us but i was glad he was there. It would have been really nice to have him there for this one as it was so clear on the screen but when the pic is printed out its very hard to make out anything

Wendy thats terrible, i had a mc too and on my next pregnancy I almost needed dh to hold me up, i just have a major fear of this first scan… i would have been heart broken if dh wasnt allowed in… its very very hard for me to get the whole pregnancy into their heads and when they get to see it on the computer it makes it all real…. very unfair. Could they not move the scanners to a portacabin in the grounds…. This hdiff must be a hell of a lot worse then they are saying!
Can we start an email to all td etc… if you are pregnant or not lets all send emails to support our fellow mummies and more so DADDIES to…. shame on them! I would be look at legal advice as to me this is descrimation to Fathers… to me its saying mothers have more right when it come to the baby. Very unfair

[Anonymous]

The ‘recovery’ area used to be for mums who had babies and they could breastfeed etc. no problem. I had no bother on my 4 children, had them with m, could feed them etc. But on my 5th child, a c.section, I was told that it wasnt used just by maternity any more but was a general recovery area so could be anybody there (probably right about the bit where a woman, who had a miscarraige, could be there also). But as far as I’m aware it wasnt always like this and there was a recovery area for the labour ward. I still think it awful, when you have a c.section, that you now can’t breastfeed your baby straight away. Its so hard to think of a baby crying for a feed. How can they say they encourage and support breastfeeding when we all know your advised to put baby to the breast as soon as. Its discriminating against women who have c.sections and need to spend time in recovery. I appreciate the concern where some people may be upset to see a new baby, but why arent they separate then as they used to be (far as I know).

I know when I was pregnant and had to be admitted 3 times during pregnancy, I was on a gynae ward where women were having a hysterectomy and on a ward where a women had a miscarriage in the next bed. I kept my curtains closed, and whispered to visitors not to talk about ‘my baby’ as the women in the next bed had lost hers. I found that so hard. Still don’t get this practice. Surely the last thing you need when you loose a baby is to hear a crying baby or see a pregnant woman.

[Jedt]

Great to hear lots of us emailing TD’s, Radio stations, TV stations etc.

Unless we kick up a fuss it will go on like this. Its disgraceful….

[jenny34]

👿 i cant believe what i am reading wait until i get into the labour ward and for them to tell me my partner has to leave hell will freeze over, i am so annoyed reading this how dare they im sorry but F£$%$$£ that he will be staying going to bed too annoyed. 😡

[Anonymous]

Think its one of those issues that gets hidden away in the bigger picture. But surely women are entitled to give birth with dignity and support if necessary. I know the hospital see women coming and going every day, but don’t forget women only give birth so many times and each experience is special. Pleae don’t ruin a very natural experience by putting in place barriers that only frustrate and worry women. I had 5 babies and my 1st experience was awful, but the hospital wasnt run by the HSE then, but the nuns. My 2nd, 3rd, 4th experience was fine. And they included a natural delivery and 2 C.Sections. My 5th was again, awful in that I didnt get baby with me and the maternity recovery area was a general area. Before I was in a side room with my baby and partner for about and hour after the section. I feel it has gone backwards in time, not forwards.

[Jedt]

Hi all,

I got the below information via email from Fergus O’Dowd, TD. He received the information from Des O’Flynn, General Manager of OLOL.

It says the situation is semi-resolved and I spoke with a couple yesterday and the dad was allowed in for the scan.

For anyone currently pregnant, it might be worth printing this out and bringing to appointments, just incase you have any problems.
*************************************************************************************

See reply below received from Mr Des O’Flynn, General Manager, Lourdes Hospital.

Regards
Fergus O’Dowd. (fergus.odowd@oireachtas.ie)

Dear Deputy O’Dowd,

I refer to you query below and I can state that in the interest of infection prevention and control the Maternity Unit in Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital is requesting women to attend ante natal appointments alone. The hospital will facilitate the attendance of husbands/partners at ante natal appointments involving scans if requested beforehand with the Maternity Unit and this arrangement is being communicated to all expectant mothers. Women with appointments have also been advised that children should not attend the hospital with them.

The Maternity Unit is also advising women that they should be accompanied by one birth partner only when in the Labour Ward and following the birth, only the birth partner is permitted to visit. The arrangements outlined above are in line with arrangements in other Maternity Hospitals in Ireland. Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital has reported that these arrangements have to date been working well for all the women and children in their care and have been positively respected and adhered to by all concerned. If any individual has a particular worry or concern the hospital has advised that they should contact the Maternity Unit directly where their concerns/worries may be addressed directly.

Regards

Des O’Flynn
Group General Manager – Louth/Meath Hospital Group Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital Drogheda Co. Louth

[Tig74]

Thanks for posting this, Sabbi.

I’m due in April, have only had a scan at my booking in appointment in early October (at which I can’t imagine a partner not being allowed into as they need his family history too…), all my other appointments have been "in and out" and no partner allowed. Cursory examinations. I’ve been a bit disappointed that there’s no sign of another scan, although I don’t like the idea of my partner missing out on seeing it if I did get one.

I have been hospitalised a few times during this (my first!) pregnancy, and something I noticed was that there were people going around offering Holy Communion wearing normal clothes and not washing their hands upon entering the wards. If the HSE are really serious about not allowing visitors because of infection risks, then surely these people should be wearing scrubs and should be washing/disinfecting whenever they enter a room? Surely being "Holy" doesn’t stop you from carrying germs?

I live in the town, so I don’t have too far to travel to the hospital, so when I do go into labour I will come home if they don’t let my partner stay with me – I am going to need him, I’ve never been through this before, and it’s really unfair on him not to be allowed in.

[Bookwitch]

If it is due to the "work to rule" it doesn’t make sense because surely the daddy is a vital extra pair of hands and calming voice which frees the midwife up to just do her job

[Author]

Posts