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Hi everyone,
Moonflower here posting from rainy Wales…
I am now almost 36 wks pregnant & after moving here just over month ago from Mornington ,i am eventually in maternity system over here…
after being told for last 5yrs by various consultants I would require a section if iever had another baby i am now being told here by midwives & consultants that this is not necessarily so after a 3rd degree tear…
apparently only 10% chance of tearing so bad again..versus 100% chance of major surgery following c section..
i am near enough convinced now will try to labour naturally as so need to be back up & about asap after birth as have no support network around us here & would love to be able to give birth naturally but little bit of me & Dh is saying i should opt for section…
anyone any advice on what to do, what they woudl do, birth positions etc to minimise tearing..
many thanks, hope everyone keeping well & enjoying their pregnancies & new babies
Hi Moonflower,
I have no advice regarding your question but just wanted to say good luck with the birth and baby whatever you choose.
If you were closer, I would be there for support ….
but not the case, and can’t advise you anything. So really I should not even reply to your post 😆 😆No matter what option you choose you have to be happy about it and all be fine.
Take care, hope to see you soon.
Fabienne
Hi from a very wet, windy & rainy Ireland 😆 😆
You can start off by massaging your perineum every day (or get your hubby to do it for you). Use a non smelly oil, like sweet almond oil or something plain like that. This will stretch the area and get it ready for birth. This cuts down on tears and need for episiotomies etc
Squatting exercises are good, try doing some of these in next few weeks to get your legs ready for birth. Practicing will strengthen your legs and help you stay in squatting positions for good lengths of time when in labour. If you like this position but your legs get tired after a while you can lean on your hubby!
Birth ball – this is great to sit on in last few weeks of pregnancy. It opens up the pelvis and helps baby descend slowly in to the birth canal. Sit on it at night when watching TV or reading a book. You can get these from 6.50 in Argos.
Breathing – I practiced the Gentlebirth programme and found it excellent. I had the Cd’s playing while I was in labour in my bath and it was reassuring and helped me stay calm. Click on the banner ad above to see more details on that.
Water is a natural pain reliever and is very soothing in labour so if you can, get into a warm bath at the hospital when your labour starts to progress. I found the warm water really took the edge off the contractions.
Positions for birth – lying on your back is not ideal so if you can lie elevated or sit on a birthing ball or birthing stool, these positions put less pressure on your lady parts and mean less chance of tearing.
I lay on my left side for our recent birth and I had a very small tear afterwards but it was grand after a few days and did not need any attention or stitches. I think staying calm helps which is where the gentlebirth came in handy for me.
Hope some of that helps, so excited for you. Please keep us posted on how you are getting on….
We’ll be waiting with great anticipation to hear about your new arrival! 😀
hey moonflower…..glad to hear all is going well…and M settling into school…and lost teeth…
ref the section, go with what you feel comfortable with and advice…as i said before i didn’t have a option had to be a section, for me the recovery from the section has been so much better than the tear, which still gives problems after 5.5yrs…section however nothing, bar the monthly pains, that have faded since having his lordship, and the scar is fine, otherwise, the 6weeks it was a breeze….
best pf luck decide what is best for you…
36 weeks… WOW! How time flies. Hope all is well over in Wales.
I dont know, i never had a tear but i did have 2 sections and after a week or 2 you feel normal again, the scar can be a bit tender at the time of the month, but really a section isnt as scary as i first thought. 10% is very low and as sabbi said there are things you can do to cut your risk down, go with your heart xxx
Hey moonflower wow 36weeks so exciting hope you’re feeling well and settling into welsh life
Do all you can to prepare for natural birth and go with your heart at end of day. I had bad experience (as you know) on dd1 but had a planned section on dd2 and was in my room with her within 1.5hr of having her – was itching to get out of bed following morning and waiting at the door to be let home 72hrs after delivery – recovery on her was so much easier than on dd1 – partialy becuase i knew what to expect and partially because i hadn’t laboured all day too 🙄 on both girls i was out for gentle walks (with buggy for support) within a few days of section, and did little things like always changing babs upstairs so i was getting lots of gentle exercise all the time.
Which ever option you choose will be best option for you M – all the very best xoxoxoYou could find the homeopathic remedy aconite 30c useful if you feel particularly anxious and fearful coming up to the birth. Dissolve two pillules in a 500ml bottle of water and sip – each sip is equal to one dose – repeat after a half hour. (If u feel no easing of anxiety after 4 doses – it is not the right remedy). The trick with remedies is to stop on improvement and restart if symptoms return.
Also remember Rescue Remedy – I recommend you get it from Healing Herbs. Their rescue remedy is called 5 Flowers and I find it more potent than the Nelsons rescue remedy. http://www.healingherbs.co.uk
There’s a post I did on Mumstown a while back on using arnica, hypericum and calendula to aid healing and recovery after birth which you may find useful.
Wishing you all the best,
Berry.thanks for replies everyone…to tell truth i am getting myself very worked up over birth now as had assumed for so long i wd be havin a section & had got head round it & am not so worried about that at all..its the natural birth route i am so frightened of after what happened last time…but its as if i am sayin i am "too posh to push" here when i mention it as they are so against it…but have never been right down there for last 6 years..so just dont want to make it worse..they keep saying oh its major surgery a c section..but so is being stiched up for 2 hrs in theatre after a bad tear but they dont go with that opinion as its only an if they say…
oh dear..yes i do need to get some of those rememdies to calm me down…also i will probably be on my own during labour as my family live 2-3 hrs away so i doubt they will be able to get here in time to look after DS, so Dh can come in with me & we dont know anyone well enough yet to even consider asking them to mind Ds…
good news is i met a girl on internet b4 i moved over & she happens to live directly opposite me here & has just an an elective c section for very same reasons as me..so weird..so going over later today for a chat & cuppa….
Sabbi..a home birth in a water pool woudl be my ideal…but have left it too late now for that option…but if i had known from beginning who knows….hope you are well recovered now & enjoying life as new mum again 🙂
If you feel happier with a C-section, push for it and they’ll do it.
You’re not to posh to push, just you were ready for a c-section for the last 6 years, changing your state of mind in couple of weeks is not easy, especially after your last bad experience.
Tell them, over and over again then they’ll go your way. Tell them that you don’t have support around you to give birth alone while your husband has to mind your child, and with elective section, your family will be there on time.They might consider the lack of support combine with previous history and anxiety to decide to go for c-section.
If you’re anxious about natural birth, it’s not going to help you, you’ll be able to do it, but might not enjoy it.
Enjoy your cuppa. Might go and make myself one.
Keep checking at the flights, can’t wait for you to have the baby so I can plan my visit.
Ok, you’re worried about birth and all and I’m there just saying, hurry up, I want to come. Is it helping ? 😆 😆Talk soon,
FabienneHi Fabs, i woudl actually prefer to go into labour all of sudden then I wouldnt have time to worry like i am now..but am enjoying a few lazy days now DS in school again..yes keep eye on those flights!
when I was feeling anxious about things (had a false labour etc few days before real thing) my midwife gave me some homeopathic remedies and they worked atreat at calming me down so its worth looking into that, as Berry suggested above.
try to take things as they comes and go with your gut…you need to do what you feel is right for you.
If you think c-section better for you, explain your fears to them and see how they respond, you may need to push a little but its your body so if that will make you feel better, try talking with them about that again.
babies are unpredictable – you could go in to labour on your own and be fine with a natural birth. there’s no rush yet, still a few weeks to go, see how you feel closer to the time
take care and keep us posted…
I thought you wanted a natural birth!!! In your case i think a section would be better, at least you know the healing time is x amount of weeks, rather then the unknown if you do tear!! Then again you could have a natural birth and pop a baby out with not a stitch!
My mam had a huge amount of stitches on her second baby, i dont know what degree tear she had, but they didnt tell you in those days, but shealways sadi they were stitching away for ages….. she had 4 more children after that birth (one 18 months later) and she never had as much as a stitch on the rest of us…. i was over 10Ibs.
So maybe with the right prep you could have a natural brith with no worries at all.
Dont let them bully you into something you dont want, try sit down and trash out your issues and see what they say…. if you mind is made up dont take no for an answer
Good luckI just googled "natural birth after 3rd degree tear"
Alot of post came up, maybe this one will put your mind at rest.I had a 3rd degree tear with my daughter 21/2 years ago, at my 32 week consultant appointment this time she advised me to go natural again as I had no problems from the first stitch up and chances of it happening again were pretty low.
Fresh from labour number 2, ……. DD2 was born on Saturday morning, another quick labour with only gas and air and this time a 2nd degree tear, had a quick recovery last time and doing fine this time too. Noone in the hospital seemed concerned at all that I had 2nd degree, classed as normal with no follow up check etc and they were happy to let me home after 6 hours (stayed in though, my choice) , only needed paracetemol.
I guess only you can make the decision, I personally didn’t want c section but I had quick recovery and no problems.
thanks for that Taylor…
have an appointment next wednesday to discuss c section & i think i am 100% going to go for this if i can…
brought raspberry leaf tea,massage oil to massage perinuem…tried to find a local natural childbirth consultant…as if i do go natural then i will have to go with definately no epiduaral (as this can make tears more likely)..last time i couldnt take the gas & air…so have been getting myself into terrible state..thinking will be alone, as DH will be with DS, no pain relief & the panicky feelings of what happens if I tear that bad again..without no pain relief i cant even imagine what it must feel like….
first time in my whole pregnancy was very down & absolutely stressed out..so rang hospital & they gave me an appointment so will see what happens next week..Dh coming with me as he feels i should go for section as he remembers more than me of how bad i was b4 & at least if we know in advance we can get my mum to come down & he can be with me…
apparently most consultants recommend their own wives go c section following bad tears as they see long term affects of damage caused by subsequent tears….
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