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I know maria its human nature that we are compelled to find the answers…. It all takes time and in my case i got worse over time, had a big blow out then felt great
I had a miscarriage on my 3rd pregnancy at 12 weeks. I had 2 children already and went on to have another 3 children after my miscarriage. What kept me going? The thoughts that if I gave up and was afraid to get pregnant then I definately would never have another child. For all the hurt and pain after a miscarriage the joy I felt when I held my newborn baby was amazing. I never took a pregnancy for granted ever again and even though I was always so nervous during my pregnancies I knew I had to try if I wanted more children. I thought I was having a miscarriage on my 6th pregnancy, was admitted to hospital and my heart broke. But fortunately I did go on to carry that baby to term. To this day he is such a blessing, every child is, but when you think you’ve lost him and then you get to see him come into the world…thats a miracle. 🙂
I think its probably easier for women who have children already to pick themselves up and keep going. At least you have a little bundle to hug.
I have no children yet and although I have a wonderful husband, its very difficult to pick yourself and have hope – particularly after 2 miscarriages.
Faith has been very important to me. I think the fear factor works as well to keep you going, because if you give up, you will never have children 🙂Foxychick,
My mum had a mc on her first pregnancy and she told me it terrified her, she thought there was something wrong with her and that she would never have a baby. She said it made her feel lonely as no one wanted to talk about it (this was 35 years ago so it was really taboo then) and with no one to talk to and no children at home to look after and get cuddles from, she was sad, lonely and had the fear of never getting pg again.
She got pg with me a few months after but nearly lost me as well. There were lots of complications and she ended up in bed for 3 months on injections from all the problems – but I turned out ok thankfully.
After her mc, she was so worried she would never have a baby and she had no one at home to hug (apart from my dad of course) but I think what you are saying is right. It must be harder if you do not yet have children when you lose one, or in your case, sadly, two little babies.
My first mc was on my second pg and I remember cuddling my little baby son so much in the weeks and months after that mc. Having him definitely helped me through it.
Your worries and fears are rational and normal – you have been through this awful trauma twice so of course you will be worried.
Try to relax and enjoy Christmas and hopefully 2011 will bring wonderful things your way. Hope you will have good news next year. xx
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