well done Siobhan today, you are v brave, i couldn’t do that

Home Forums Pregnancy Loss, Bereavement & Depression well done Siobhan today, you are v brave, i couldn’t do that

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  • #9029
    ciarac
    Member

    Well done Siobhan today on ireland am…… you were v brave to go on tv and hold it together, well done.

    unfortunately like you i miscarried also in April and again in June, and i am devestated behond words. I am angry, sad, mad, crazy even! v hard to deal with….. never expected it to happen to me twice in a row, had 3 kids already and while a few scares with first one, everything went fine….. i found out 5 weeks after my miscarriage in june that I was pregnant, and to be honest, i don’t know how i feel.
    We are completly shocked by the pregnancy, delighted but SCARED out of my mind, the last 5 weeks since we have found out, i am a mess, i am scared at everything, igo to the loo and am constantly checking for any bleeding…… didn’t even go to the gp until last week as the last 2 times i went to him, i miscarried that night. I know, sounds stupid, but didn’t want to bring any bad luck to this pregnancy.
    i havent been even a quarter sick as i was with all the others, again a major worry, and have had a few strange pains yesterday and today, so i am a bag of nerves, a total mess………
    When i heard you say this morning that you still had your bump, going to the loo all the time, i am really freaking out… i was trying to ease myself into thinking, well i have a bump, so thats good, i am going to the loo a million times a day, thats good………. but now, am i just fooling myself and being completly stupid???????
    sorry for the moan….. have a scan next WEd, the 1st….. our first childs big day too, starting "big" school…. so will be an eventful morning for me, i hope for all the right reasons……… but the wait is killing me……… its killing me at the moment, as i am pretending not to be pregnant in my head, trying to prepare myself for the worst… and its so hard, just wish i could shout from the roof tops that i was pregnant but i can’t…….
    i just HATE this sooooo sooo much, i am living in a time bomb and by next wed it could all blow up in my face……………

    anyway wanted to say you were so brave today, i couldn’t have been strong like that at all……

    #98605
    Taylor5
    Member

    Oh Ciara thats terrible, i will say a little prayer for you next wednesday. xxxxxxxx

    #98685
    ciarac
    Member

    Oh Ciara thats terrible, i will say a little prayer for you next wednesday. xxxxxxxx

    Thanks! a nervous wreck waiting…… between dd starting " big" school and the scan, my nerves are gone!

    #98688
    Jedt
    Keymaster

    Ciarac,

    You poor thing, the worry is unbelievable, I know how you feel…..a pregnancy after a miscarriage is so scary but hopefully it will be ok. I had a pregnancy after my 1st miscarriage and it went well. Felt different to the previous one but worked out great (she is a little carcker, she starts school Monday)

    I just about kept it together on TV3 the other day and then cried my eyes out on the way home. I was on LMFM Thursday and during the news break the presenter and me were both sitting in studio with tears in our eyes, its such a sad thing to go through. I was so sad about it that I made her cry too 😳 I feel like a wet blanket at the moment, not like ‘myself’ at all. I had coffee with a friend today and he was asking where I’ve been, I’ve been so quiet and its not like me but I guess I’m just laying low while I come to terms with our 2nd miscarriage, I’m finding it tough….its just so senseless, I can’t get my head around it.

    I am so sorry for your losses too. Its bad enough to go through it once but twice or more is so awful – you just wonder ‘why???’ but there seems to be no answers to that one. All you can do is let people know how you are feeling and get the support you need to help you through it.

    Just writing this post is a good thing, you are allowing yourself to get things off your chest and thats good, hopefully it will give you some sort of release.

    Iknow this is a useless thing to say but try not to worry too much, if you can do something to take your mind off things then do it. Go to the cinema or take your little one to the playground…anything to take your mind off it.

    One thing I have learned is that every pregnancy is totally different so hopefully you’ll go on Wednesday and get good news. Try not to put too much stock into previous pregnancies and how you felt, they are all individual and this may turn out to be fine.

    I am keeping fingers, toes and anything else I can crossed for you.

    Will be thinking of you on Wednesday, good luck.

    Siobhan xx

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