Separation Anxiety…Please help

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  • #14446
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Well Hailey is 6 months old this week & for the past 2 months she crys if anyone other than me or my partner holds her.I could even be sitting right beside the person holding her & she still crys & as soon as i am holding her again she stops.we have tried a lot of things at this stage but nothing seems to work.does anyone have any tips as to how to help her get over this very tricky period?.

    Im worried as to how she will ever cope when she starts in creche if shes is like this with family & friends.

    #122320
    Jedt
    Keymaster

    Some babies can be quite clingy – our 9 month old is a lot like that lately. We had our sons communion here the other day and there were klots of people here and she would not even go to my sister, she only wanted her daddy or me and occasionally, she would go to her nanny (my mam) who see sees quite a lot.

    However, if I leave her in my mams house and go off for a while she is grand when I’m gone! My dad can take her for a walk, my sisters play with her and she is good for my mam, eating & taking her bottles. But as soon as my hubby and/or me come through the door, she is nearly caterpulting herself into our arms, into mine especially. my hubby asks me sometimes if he can go in first, so she will put her arms out to him because he knows as soon as she sees me, it will only be me she wants!

    I stopped breastfeeding 2 weeks ago and I thought that would make it easier for everyone but she still just wantsme most of the time!

    Can you leave her with a close relative for an hour or two, once or twice a week? I know its hard and she may cry at first but she will get used to it and it will be good for her to be able to be with others to give you guys a break.

    HTH

    #122323
    joeyrudd
    Member

    i’m still dealing with it and she’s 3…i’m dreading september when she stars creche
    she was fine with other people when she was a baby though

    #122324
    Jedt
    Keymaster

    Joey when you went to the loo that day in Laurence centre and I was watching her for a fewmins, she stayed glued to me and was watching out for you but she did not cry so hopefully she will be ok in creche!

    its hard when they only want their mammy. on one level we love it but on another, it worrying when we have to be away from them!

    #122325
    joeyrudd
    Member

    Joey when you went to the loo that day in Laurence centre and I was watching her for a few mins, she stayed glued to me and was watching out for you but she did not cry so hopefully she will be ok in creche!

    its hard when they only want their mammy. on one level we love it but on another, it worrying when we have to be away from them!
    she won’t even stay with her dad 😆 …i’m hoping she’ll be fine in september

    #122326
    allseasons
    Member

    we often come across this, dealing with babies, toddlers and little kiddos, it’s very common, but gladly we can say it does pass..

    we’ve experienced it even with our own children being so clingy and even leaving them for a few mins breaks your heart seeing them cry but in all honesty the child settles after a few mins…

    we do alot of distraction with a new child and softly introduce them to their surroundings….
    we have also found photobooks quite helpful for a child having some photos from home near by where they can see their family and we can talk about who is in the photo, that may help too…

    each child is different and will react diiferently some may take a little longer to settles others settle rather quickly…we would always here at our creche allow parents to phone and check in, we’ve even sent a photo of the child playing a little while later to help ease the parents….

    if you are starting creche or leaving a child with someone new, we always ask for the child to come in over a little period close to when they are due to start with us, let them play, introduce to their carer, and when a parent is going we always get them to say goodbye so the child knows the parent is going but will return, it’s ok if the child is crying they will settle…after a little bit it becomes routine and the child/baby settles into that routine…and mammy and daddy too, sometimes some parets just drop and run, whatever suits some, but we have found bringing mommy or daddy to the setting and letting the child play knowing mommy or daddy is near by and this is a safe place eases the child…rather then just being handed over and turning around and mommy and daddy are gone….it’s hard to leave a child crying and distraught it nearly makes you not want to leave it can be harder on mommy and daddy but your child is being cared for in the best possible way….
    but don’t let it upset you or worry you, your little one will realise that it’s ok to meet new people and she will be safe with others….hth

    #122327
    Jedt
    Keymaster

    I think its great that All Seasons has a drop in service, its a great way to slowly get the child used to being at creche and away from Mammy for a while before he/she is going on a regular basis.

    For more on the drop in service just contact the girls in All Seasons, they are absolutely lovely!! http://allseasons-childcare.net/

    #122332
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I really hope it does pass like you all say but god it seems like it will never end.I do try & leave her for a few minutes here & there with my parents or my sister but i could be just upstairs & the crying just gets louder & louder & she gets more panicked & then she starts struggling to breath as she gets herself in such a state,so i wouldnt leave her crying like that for more than 15 minutes with whoever she is with as she is still only on one lung (her other lung should be fully developed in 3-4 months) & it takes her a good while to get her breathing back to normal after a crying fit.

    I know a lot of her separation anxiety is down to the fact that when she got out of hospital we were told by doctors to keep her away from other people for at least 6 weeks so she has spent a lot of time with just the 2 of us.

    hopefully things will improve as you all say….but just wish i could do something to help her now

    #122335
    Jedt
    Keymaster

    I went to the bathroom this morning and our baby followed me, crawling at top speed and waited outside banging the door and calling for me while I was peeing! Talk about peeing under pressure!!! 😳 😳

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