Rude midwife…

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  • #12918
    julymam
    Member

    One of my friends is pg with her first baby and had her first appointment this morning in olol…
    As many of you know on your first pregnancy you don’t have much of a clue whats going on and what you’re doing!

    When she went to the midwife for administration, her partner was told ‘you wait outside’ while all that she was doing was being weighed and blood pressure taken!! Any time i’ve been before my husband came in with me or I was asked if i wanted him in the room or not!
    Then they all went into a room to fill in the admin stuff, and my friend was asked if she was planning on bfing…she said she probably wouldn’t be but she hadn’t made her mind up yet. The midwife said ‘well there’s no point in me wasting my words then’ :o :shock: :shock: !!!! I would be of the opinion that if someone is not entirely sure what they want to do(her first pregnancy for gods sake!) you would give them all the information and let them digest it all and make an informed decision instead of shutting the subject down altogether…
    Then towards the end the midwife told my friend she will be going for her scan on whatever floor it was, so my friend proceeded to stand up as she thought she was finished there and the midwife says to her ‘oh sure you just want to go get your scan’ like wtf?!! all that was left was to sign the form. :evil:
    People like this frustrate the hell out of me, if you can’t deal with people don’t be in a job where you have to deal with them face to face every day..or don’t bring your bad moods to work with you its not fair on my friend and other mothers especially first time mothers, that first appointment is so exciting for most and someone like that could ruin the whole experience.

    thats my rant over!! I can’t tell anyone about my friend because only a couple of us know so I had to vent somewhere lol!!

    #116645
    Jedt
    Member

    Most of us run into someone who is either rude or having a bad day during pregnancy. Its a wonder your poor friend did not leave in tears, its upsetting when you do not get a nice midwife. Most are great but there’s always the odd few who are grumpy.

    I had a grumpy midwife at my booking appt. on baby number 3, I was trying to get into the MLU but she told me I was ‘obese’. I am usually around a size 12 but it was week 17 of my pregnancy when they first weighed me and they did not take my bump into consideration. I was so upset, to have someone call me that was upsetting but when I tried to reason with her that I would not have been classed as obese if they had weighed me earlier in my pregnancy – she did not want to know.

    I was so upset, ended up having a big row with her and the following week, booked a homebirth. Looking back, it was hormonal decision but luckily it turned out to be a fab birth so I guess I have her being a stroppy mare to thank for it 😛

    If your friend needs to rant, send her our way!! Lots of support on here for her. 🙂

    #116646
    julymam
    Member

    I’ll tell her to come on here sabbi 😉

    it was prob the same midwife you dealt with lol! When she was telling me I said i prob would’ve burst into tears if i’d been in her situation but she’s not as sensitive as me…she’d usually take no crap but as she’s never been in the situation before she was didn’t know what to think!!

    Also the midwife said to her partner ‘are you the babys father?’ and he was a bit short and said yes and midwife says ‘i have to ask these questions dont take it personally’!! no niceness in her at all, my blood would’ve been boiling 😡 😡

    That was awful what you were told, there’s no need for rudeness like that its terrible. Thank god my friend has an appt with mlu so she hopefully won’t have to deal with that midwife again 🙂

    #116647
    Jedt
    Member

    If she gets into the MLU she’ll be very well looked after, they are all lovely in there! in fairness, most of the midwives are great, theres just the odd cranky one 😡

    Lets hope next time she has a better experience. 😀

    #116648
    happymumblemum
    Participant

    Sounds like the one I met at booking in…have to say though liked her..no nonsense and getting the job done..its so different i guess on your first though…

    She did tell me though I was too fat for that nirvana of birth units the MLU 😆

    On my first pregnancy my consultant in semi private Holles Street was brusque and extremely QUICK!!! i think I saw her for a total of ten minutes the whole pregnancy..i timed one appointment once and it was 1 minute 15 seconds 😆 😆 😆 have to say it suited me fine to be honest and I took the whole pregnancy in my stride..whereas this time I am a nervous wreck 😆

    Your poor friend..tell her to come on here she can stay anon!!!!

    #116653
    Moonflower
    Member

    they do seem to be that way sometimes..not full of chat & chirpyness which you would hope they would be…i suppose it all gets a bit mundane to them after a while…shouldnt be thou really…but tell your friend & i am a very sensitive soul & often get hurt by peoples words..it was very rare to have such a bad experience in OLOL, i always foundthem friendly enough…hope her next appointment goes much better for her…

    #116660
    noeleenw
    Member

    i remember after having ds now 10 by c-section had been in labour for 36 hours beforehand , so my mood was not great 😆 was trying to bf and the trainee nurse stood on my toes 🙄 🙄 my dh thought i was going to deck her , i just said give him a f**king bottle .. really was not what i wanted at that time …

    #116663
    julymam
    Member

    I knowshe’ll be well looked after in mlu, i was in mlu all during my pregnancy on ds and always found them great…so relaxed, i was in tears when i had to be transferred to ante natal 😥 😥 lol

    I know some people are straight to the point and no nonsense but this one was just plain rude how she went on. I’ve had my 2 babies in olol and found most of the midwives/nurses/doctors great…there’s always the odd one or two 🙂

    #116666

    my friend who is a midwife has 5 kids gave me a warning when i was pregnant on dd do not mind them midwives who have no children and think they know it all just because they are trained in the job they have not experienced the actual childbirth them selves they really dont have a clue i was laughing when she said this to me she has 18 years experience of being a midwife.

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