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December 18, 2009 at 12:25 pm #6415BookwitchMember
Guys I am looking for some advice about an upsetting incident that happened on facebook.
I posted up a throwaway comment about getting rid of the governement and a friend of mine began a barrage of attacking comments about the fact that I had plenty of money because my husband is public sector, that I didn’t live in the real world, etc.,
If it was just someone who I knew vaguely I probably wouldn’t care but this is a girl I know sonce I was 13 we sat together in school and I thought we were close. She is my son’s godmother!!!
I have deleted the comments off my facebook profile and was wondering how I should deal with it?
I appreciate that she is struggling as her Dp is out of work but why attack me?
Those of you who know me inReal life know I am not loaded and that I am a nice person I hope?
I was going to give her a few days to cool off and then ring her as it will be Christmas soon and I don’t want to fall out?December 18, 2009 at 12:52 pm #84163yummymummyMemberIf it were me I’d prob have it out with her BIG TIME!!!
How dare she attack YOU…bringing a throwaway comment of yours into a personal attack. Honestly…..some people have nothing better to be doing with their time.
Of course if you feel like you dont want to upset anyone over x mas thats your perogative..but rem she upset you first and no its not tit for tat but if she is a good friend then 1. she shouldnt have done that in the first place and 2. does she just expect you lie back and take it??
(My mate is a teacher and my mam is a nurse and I joke about it all the time….never once have i madea personal attack on them, it would just be general chit chat in a jokey way)
December 18, 2009 at 1:29 pm #84165munchinParticipanta "friend" should never attack you on a public forum like that were friends etc can see it – if she has a problem with you she should have gone to you full stop if she has a bee in her bonnett and so what if your hubby works in public sector = that’s none of her business
personally i agree with yummy and you should have it out with her sooner rather than later – why should it be hanging over you for the christmas – possibly even send her an email – saying how dissapointed you are that she felt she had to attack you like that etc
good luck hope it works outDecember 18, 2009 at 1:58 pm #84170missysmumMembertis the season to be jolly…………………i wouldn’t do anything impulsive…….think about yourself and ure family here. if you have a big confrontation with this friend it could put a dark cloud over you and your families xmas and your friends’. i’d let the dust settle a bit…….afterall we are all only human……….maybe she was having a really bad day??
just my tuppence, hope it doesnt to continue to upset you whatever you decide to do. good luck.
December 18, 2009 at 2:03 pm #84171BookwitchMemberthanks guys some food for thought there
December 18, 2009 at 3:01 pm #84180Taylor5MemberMaybe she was just having an off moment, you dont know what stresses she is under with her dh out of work and xmas etc…
She could have been in a bit of a rut and she took it out on you, maybe she feels your the lucky one an there you are moaning…… i would say it to her but dont go off on one. Believe me i did this on a few months ago, got the wrong end of the stick and ended up looking like a fool, got things out in the open but i did regret saying anything in the end iykwim……Give her a ring and tell her that the comments upset you and give her a chance to explaine…. im sure she didnt mean it. Sure when we hurt people its always the ones we love and the ones who are closest to us
December 18, 2009 at 7:15 pm #84197hjsMemberLife’s too short, none of us know what’s round the corner.
Ring her, call down to her, email her, whenever, whatever, but persist awhile. You need to have a clear conscience that while it was her who (unnecessarily) took umbridge (sp?) at ur post, it was you who did all you could to mend things.
But then you have to take a view at some stage too – if she’s not being gracious and accepting your olive branch(es), don’t keep beating yourself up about it, close that door, and move on in your life.
December 18, 2009 at 7:57 pm #84206scole1Memberbookwitch that’s sad to hear, sometimes people have so much going on that they feel those closest to them is the easiest to attack….however the best thing would be let it settle…take with a pinch of salt…and then when you are ready send an e-mail asking how things are etc etc….see how she responds, then if her attitude has changed and she’s give a friendly reply then perhaps she was on a bad day (that still doesn’t mean that she should get away with it) but perhaps ask her why she felt she needed to say the things she said…..
it also depends on how friendly you are with the person too, and how much that friendship means…..i find sometimes people take your loyalty and friendship for granted and feel they can say things without thinking, and sometimes it takes for something like this to show really how loyal the are or how much they value your friendship….some will speak without thinking it can be hurtful but if they know you they should in turn know how something like that can upset you and also damage a friendship…anyway hope things get sorted out, all will become clearer no doubt in time, but for the time being don’t think too much about it as it will get ya down and you and your family have more happy things to think about rather than a negative comment…. 😉
December 18, 2009 at 9:42 pm #84238BabsMemberI’d just call her…sort it out!!! Perhaps she took you up the wrong way, or maybe you touched on something which isn’t your issue but hers…give her the opportunity to explain and give yourself the chance to clear the air…you have every right to express yourself, so maybe she was being over sensitive and needs a reality call!! Don’t loose sleep over it…real friends won’t disappear over such minor things!!!
December 19, 2009 at 11:08 pm #84284BookwitchMemberThanks for replies girls will call her tomorrow and let you know how it goes
December 19, 2009 at 11:11 pm #84286AnonymousInactivethere will be always jelious people out there, so send her a private message and if it makes you feel better delete the comment off your page.!!!!
chin up to eveyone santa is 6 sleeps away 😀 -
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