minding other peoples children over night

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  • #1591
    pinkbabe
    Member

    I have my mates child here tonight sleeping over (my poor bro having to babysit 3) & she is already whinging for her mum (she’s 7 & I have known her since she was born) she goes to afterschool & is used to being away from her mum but when I phoned mum there to say she was ‘playing up’ mum said ‘oh I usually sit with her til she falls asleep’ eh what ??? I don’t think I will be doing that me thinks that is a bad case of working mum guilt & I am sorry but I wouldn’t do it with my own so I will not be sitting in the bedroom with her.

    She then asked who she was sleeping with so I told her she is in L’s room on her own (she has her own room @ home) & I can’t have them awake half the night playing with my bro minding them & they’d definitly ‘play up’ if they were together so she said ‘oh she prob wants me coz you are being mean to her’.

    Am I being mean? I don’t think I am it’s nearly 9 o clock my small people would be well asleep if she wasn’t here & I am doing my mate a favour taking her child over night

    #35957
    joey_rudd
    Member

    I don’t think your being mean, if her mam chooses to spoill her like that shes asking for trouble when shes older and asking for outrageous things that she can’t give her…you have your own children to think of first
    I think its her mams fault forcatering to her so much
    you stick to what you feel is right

    #35971
    rossylisa
    Member

    pink your not being mean any time i have my nieces down for the night they always sleep in the spare room because they would be up all night playing if they slept together and as for staying beside her until she falls asleep whats that all about she is 7 🙄 when i putting dd to bed i read her a short story before she goes up the stairs and then bring her up give her a kiss and hugs and tuck her up so does dh then the door is closed and she is out cold within 5 mins…….. if i was you id tell her to come over and collect her tonight if she keeps playing up on you

    #35991
    Taylor5
    Member

    my nephew is a fecker when he is going to bed, but when he stays here he is like a dream. He goes asleep in a flash and sleeps all night, my sister doesnt believe me as he is a nightmare at home. I tell him I wont take any messing and if he does he wont be coming back. If she isnt going to settle then ring her mum to collect her.

    #36006
    pinkbabe
    Member

    Thanks girls I just felt like a bit of a b**** but in all honesty the phonecall to her mam didn’t help

    Anyway I told her just b4 I went to work (she didn’t know i was going) I didn’t wanna hear another word from her & thankfully my bro didn’t hear a peep out of her while I was gone 🙂

    Her mum came over the next morning & when I came into the living room my tele was face down on the floor 👿 L told me that R & mates child knocked it down (I was furious) told them both they’d have to ask santa for a new tele for me. Don’t think my mate was too impressed with my parenting but her child needs to know that IN MY HOUSE their are consequences to her actions.

    Don’t think I will be asked to mind her again OOPS 😆

    #36011
    Taylor5
    Member

    Is the tv broken? Do you have house insurance? If so Im sure it would be covered on yourpolicy

    #36014
    pinkbabe
    Member

    no house insurence (silly me) tv seems to have no channels now but plays dvd (wierd) I’ll get my dad down tomorrow to have a look, he used to be a tv engineer back in the day

    #36030
    Taylor5
    Member

    Silly girl its something worth investing in, the AA do great value insurance or FBD. It well worth having, we had a leak in a pipe and the wooden floor in the sunroom/ kitchen had to be replaced, they paid out 4k without a blink of an eye.

    #36037
    pinkbabe
    Member

    any of that is my landlords issue, I should have contents insurance tho I’ll look into it. Didn’t have much worth insuring when I moved in & hadn’t really thought about it since

    #36044
    Taylor5
    Member

    Just think if you had to replace every stitch of clothes or pair of shoes in your case, you would be bankrupt 😆 😆 😆 You could just cover those things etc. talk to the insurance company, tell them you dont want kitchens covered etc just clothes and personal things, you’ll be surprised it will be fairly cheap to do

    #36082
    pinkbabe
    Member

    I will look into it Thanks Taylor (could do with getting laptop covered too. I’d be fooked if I had to replace it)

    #36102
    happymumblemum
    Participant

    Pink I see that a few percent in your poll do think you are a b***h while I wouldnt go that far and I do agree with most of your comments about the own room, the telly thing… I dont think it an unreasonable request for a parent to ask a baby sitter to stay with their daughter while they got to sleep. every one deals with their children differently and there is no right or wrong only the way where the child feels most secure.

    And yes I do stay with my daughter till she sleeps and no I dont have working mums guilt as I am a SAHM I just do for my daughter which feels right and if sitting in her room having a final chat about the day and stroking her hair for 5 minutes while she drifts off isnt right then god help me!!!!!

    Getting away from your thread Pink I personally believe and its a free country !!that far to many off these parenting books etc are all about pulling away from your child in a round about way and forcing them to fend for themselves too early in life …thats just my opinion.

    #36130
    Taylor5
    Member

    HMM I dont see a problem rubbing dd hair for 5 mins having a chat about the day, its when it turns into an hour or more (as in my sisters case) it a bit ott. But what works for one wont work for another

    #36133
    yummymummy
    Member

    i usd to have to lay with ds to get him asleep and to be quite honest there was better things i could have doing with that hour or two that i decided it had to stop, not only was it affecting me and (x) bf but my parents too when they took him on an overnighter. took me about a week to get him to sleep on his own and boy am i one happy bunny now, he goes to bed at 8pm now and not a peep outta him till 7.30 am ( depending on bad dreams)

    #36161
    pinkbabe
    Member

    point taken HMM & if you are leaving DD I would assume you would explain this to your sitter (not the case with my mate until the child was upset & I phoned) & as a mam to 2 children who go to bed without me being there I honestly wouldn’t have agreed to babysit if I had known it was expected of me. There is no way I want my children to start asking for me to stay with them til they sleep for a couple of reasons…

    1 they sleep in seperate rooms so who do I sit with??

    2 I feel that as a single memmy by bedtime I need to put them to bed & know they’ll sleep if I have to leave them with a sitter while I work

    3 I can’t see my family sitting for me if my 2 didn’t have such a handy bedtime routine, quick wash, hug, nite nite & door closed (it’s hard enuf to get them to babysit as it is)

    But each to their own & I am sure neither of our children (or my mates) will be scarred by their bedtime routine

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