May 4, 2012 at 1:51 pm #14398AnonymousInactive
Just need to voice my anger today
My 5 year old son was very upset leaving school yesterday. When I asked him what was wrong he told me that one of the girls in his class was having a party yesterday and didnt invite him. I told him that the invites might have went out when he was off sick but he said that she came in with them last week and gave everyone one except him.
He was so upset watching all the kids going into the party – my blood was boiling.
I was going to approach the mum today and ask her why but didntwant to lower myself to letting her know that we even noticed.
What would you do? Would you say it to her??May 4, 2012 at 2:10 pm #122154chewieodieMember
Our school has a policy that you can’t hand out invites etc to the parties while in the school. As a parent, you have to contact the school, the school will in turn advise the parents that the birthday child’s mom would like to get in touch with them re the birthday party….
This way, no kids are "left out" when handing out invites etc….
Much kinder this way I think…. 😉
I’ve just recently had a birthday party for my 5 year old daughter, and we invited 6 little girls from her class. We aren’t in a position to have had every child from the class there…. so I just had a little party at home for her and the kids she plays with…
It really is tough when they come home and say that x had a party and they weren’t invited…. heartbreaking really. Was it really every child except yours? Hopefully it was just an oversight… without something sinister behind it. God luv him… poor little man….May 4, 2012 at 3:38 pm #122156mammycoolParticipant
Our school – the teacher will put in bags only if there is an invite for every child. If you are inviting only some – then you must organise yourself outside. The mams tend to hand the invites to the other mothers – tends to be a boy party or a girl party with a small bit of both.
That girl should not have been allowed give out invites in class – especially when all children were not invited. They are so easily hurt at that age.May 4, 2012 at 4:46 pm #122163
It was definitely only him left out as I spoke with all the other mums and they were all dropping their kids down to the party.
I just find it so unfair and trying to explain to a 5 year old why he was left out is just awful.
Usually the teacher does give out the invites but on this occassion the girl handed them out to the kids herself.May 4, 2012 at 4:49 pm #122164
in our school its done before or after school, but the kids do see others getting the invites.
My ds would get alot of invites, but a neighbours child in his class wouldnt get half as many, my heart does break for this child! I told them on day that when we have parties the numbers are limited and if only inviting 10 then some kids will be left out and somedays they will be the kids left out, they seemed to understand.
I couldnt not invite some kids, hence i had 22 kids about ds’s partyMay 6, 2012 at 7:42 pm #122176JedtMember
That sounds really mean to leave one child out. we invited 4 friends from school to our sons party at the weekend and it was done through the school, so the other kids in the class were not aware of it and therefore, no one was hurt or upset.
could it have been a mistake? it sounds very mean to deliberately leave one child out, maybe she did not mean it?
I can understand why you are upset, I would be too in your shoesMay 6, 2012 at 9:17 pm #122179
I know for a fact that it was not a mistake.
One of my friends was telling me that last year the same girl did that on her son and he was very upset and couldnt understand why.
I just think that it was very unfair of her to do this.
But its in the past now and life is too short.
xMay 7, 2012 at 2:49 pm #122187JedtMember
It says more about her than anything. If that is the kind of person she is, you would not want him there anyway.
Still very hurtful and how can a 5 year old understand. poor little guy.
Some people are just not nice….May 8, 2012 at 9:25 am #122193MaryEMember
The poor fella. Not nice but that is life, i am afraid.
My son gets invited to a lot of parties but i know his best friend gets invited to a lot more then him. Sometimes he askes me if he can go to these parties, he will know where its happening and everything but i have to say "No" sorry you weren’t invited.
I always just make up some plan of something else fun to do at the time – like visit his cousins or go swimming etc.
Rejection is not nice but what wont kill you, will make you stronger.May 8, 2012 at 11:08 am #122197AnonymousInactive
I’ve had a similar experience…can’t say too much, but there is a ‘piece of work’ mum in the pre school that my son goes to. She is trying to be the mother hen since the start of the school year. Recently, she invited a whole gang of kids and their mums back to her daughters house. We all walked down the estate together as we have done previous days, and then they all said goodbye to us and merrily went on their way. The thing is my son knew what was going on and worst still could see them from his bedroom window. My heart broke for him as I could hear him calling out their names from his bedroom and asking me why they wouldn’t answer him and why he wasn’t able to go around. Did all the usual explanations. But, it sucks…. And no, I know she didn’t just do it without thinking. She has a girl, so I could understand just inviting girls, but know she invited his best friend from around the corner. I have to say, I became very depressed leaving him up to school after this. I’ve distanced myself from them now. Nicer people in the world and I really have no time for her and her so called friends.May 8, 2012 at 7:07 pm #122215
Cjuliet that is terrible, he is only a baby! How coudl you explaine that to him!
Misemammy3 did that mammy invite everyone in the class or did she leave others out aswel?
I had a woman ask me one day why my ds didnt go to her sons party, i said he didnt get an invite!! The mum asked me to look in his bag as she sent in the invite with his name and surname (two kids in class with same christian name)I asked ds and he said no he didnt get an invite! We never found out what happened the invite…
Last week my friend was sending out invites, she was going through the school list and he ds came across a kids name and said "i dont want him at my party i dont like him!!!" I think its tough if kids dont like someone, they should have to have them at their party.
Im only letting ds have 10 from his class this year, plus his street friends! I will be leaving 18 kids out, but i cant invite everyone…. i think kids should be told its not personal and it just what happens when you have to stick to numbersMay 9, 2012 at 9:12 am #122225
He was the only one in the classroom not to get an invite. There are two classes in his room – Junior and Senior. The girl is in Senior. She handed out the invites and left him out. His best friend who he sits beside was invited and was asking him why he didnt get an invite and he just said i dont know.
Its in the past now and he hasnt mentioned it since but at the time it was very upsetting for him trying to understand why he wa left out.
Kids can be very cruel – but the parents should know better!May 10, 2012 at 9:12 am #122238
Thats terrible!!!! What a bitch… that mammy not the child. how could you leave one child out, now i understand why you are so angry, im sorry but i would have to take her to task on it, I would let her know how upset your ds was, i would also call into the school and explaine to the teacher… invites shouldnt be given out in class like that for that very reasonMay 10, 2012 at 10:33 am #122247happymumblemumParticipant
its very difficult for younger kids to understand this, my dd started to understand around 1st class that it was all about the cost rather than anything that sometime kids were only allowed to choose a few people.
BUT there is no excuse if the WHOLE class are invited and 1 child is excluded and if it were me I would ask why my child was excluded.May 10, 2012 at 11:01 am #122252munchinParticipant
my dd’s birthday was in nov and one of the reasons i didn’t have a playcentre party was i afraid we wouldn’t know all the kids name by then and accidently forget a child
she has mentioned that one child has had a party and she’s not been invited – i just told her that sure everyone can’t be invited all of the time and she thankfully seems to have accepted it
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