Helo!

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    Hi everyone. My name is Katherine and i am from Poland. I have been living in Ireland since 2004, i came here right after high school. I am a mother of a 9 year old girl and at the moment i am unemployed and in the process of obtaining level 5 and 6 education in Community Care. I am also in the process of divorce proceedings which is takes very long and is very frustrating. I am going to be very honest here giving my reason for searching this site and creating this profile. I have been struggling very much as a single parent since my ex husband moved out. The struggle concerns financial, mental and child support. As we know, in Ireland when two parents split up a child usually stays with mother (not all the cases, but most if we look at statistics) and father goes off his way. In my situation father went his way and did not gave any concern about his child neither me. What i mean is that he did not care about financial support(had to drag him to court for maintenance) and also did not care in helping me babysit our 3 year old daughter at time which would allow me to go to work.While he was free to roam the country in search of job and doing school having all the free time in the world not concerned at all , that i need his support. After all our child has two parents that should be responsible, not one. I was basically stuck one place, sitting home on social welfare which was driving me crazy and made me very lazy. We all know that having full time job that pays minimum will cover most of the childcare and its not worth going to work. Its been 5 years after and i am doing my school (paying from child benefit for school) only getting my life straight while he was working all the time and doing school in between which will guarantee him good income. It is just so not freaking fear! My point in all i am writing is, that the law in Ireland is really messed up when it comes to single parents. I have been in court so many times and i was trying to bring that issue to my solicitor and judge and they both said same thing: “you can not force a father to see his child more often”. I was so furious when i heard that. And i thought to myself this is not right, it should not happen and fathers should be brought into responsibility of supporting a single mother not only financially, but in parenting, taking care of, contributing to development of the child and so on! Struggling still and pushing my ball of crap against all odds (excuse my language here) i came with an idea to write to a TD’s and lay down the problem, hoping that maybe one day this law will change. But first step i need to do, i need to check how many parents are in the simular situation i am. I need to gather some kind of statistics, figures if you will, to help them see the problem, full picture. So please let me know if you will be able to respond to my survey i am working on. I need to know if i will have any answers on this forum. Thank you.

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