first communion

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  • #3211
    libby1
    Participant

    I wonder why children who don’t go to mass are allowed to make their first holy communion???

    Is this a pressure thing for families – the nicest dress ?? the big party?? the marquee in the garden?? the entairtment???

    I think their is no excuse for children going to mass.

    There is children’s masses and childrens rooms in some church’s…

    I suppose children can’t be blamed for what their parents do?

    #66471
    yummymummy
    Member

    hmm i reckon this stems from comments made in inane chat 🙂

    lets start with, how would the prist know if a child didnt go to mass to say whether or not he/she can make first holy communion, have a roll call??? highly unlikey!!

    for me it isnt pressure from family at all, for me (and ill prob be shot down for this) but its the done thing, i was baptised, communion, confirmation and so was ds dad so therefore ds will as well, and its obviously not for the dress or my ds would look fairly out of place in a church full of boys in suits.

    why shouldnt he make his communion just cos i dont bring him to church????? shouldnt he make it and then decide for himself when he is older whether he wants to go to mass or not, having a first communion wont harm his choice in the matter.

    i was made go to mass when i was younger and so when the time came for me to make my own choice as to whether to go or not i chose not to go, my own choice and i wont have people ramming their opnions on whether or not just cos myself or ds doesnt go to mass hat he shouldnt make his first communion.

    seeing as he is making it next year i will make the effort to bring him to mass as much as possible.

    sorry but who are you to decide whether its right or wrong to make it without having first gone to mass?? just a question

    #66473
    libby1
    Participant

    I just asked the question , i have a daughter whom will make it next week , it was just a question?

    We spent a lot of time discussing this at work lately, just wondering , i thought it was healthly to discuss things.

    i THOUGHT THIS WEBSITE WAS TO PROMOTE GETTING THINGS OFF YOUR CHEST- i seem to be wrong….

    Everyone is allowed their opinion… it is a free world . Didn’t mean to offend anyone.

    I think last year their was an article in the Drogheda Ind about this…

    I just think it is sad to see kids been brought to mass before they make thier communion and confirmation… I am allowed my opinion , or was that taken in the Budget????

    #66475
    Taylor5
    Member

    Im with Libby on this (but please pull in your horns we dont get all nasty and ratty on this site)

    I dont go to mass and my ds (was 3 in July) hasnt been christened due to this fact, when we start bringing him to mass then we will make that choice…. I also feel the same for couples who never crossed the door of a church yet have massive big white weddings, I think its all for the party and day out now days rather then teaching kids belief and right from wrong.

    No kids should be allowed take a scarament of holy communion if they dont practise as a Catholic and its up to tha parents to bring them up as Catholics not the children or the schools

    #66478
    libby1
    Participant

    i just wondered what people think?

    I am sure it is rubbing salt in some people wounds… it is just my opinion..

    I am no angel either…

    #66491
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    I don’t understand why you would want your child to make 1st communion, confirmation etc if you are not practising the religion and taking part in what isoffered on a day to day basis. This question equally applies to baptisim and marriage also. People can have a naming ceremony or a civil marriage if they don’t want or believe in all the church trappings.

    If a person is practising any religion they participate with the customs and practice for that particular religion. I have found it incredible to watch the amount of financial preparation and organising the "day" that goes into first communions in the last few years. It has really become a social occasion more than a religious one. A great example is the story of the girl who was late at the hairdressers the morning of her communion and didnt get to the church she was so late so didnt get to the church to acually make her communion but had the hair, the dress, the meal etc. !!!!!!!! Crazy but not impossible to believe.

    I always find it amusing to see all the children on the 1st sunday after communion in the church in all the gear and thats it done then.

    I can appreciate the pressure is on parents to let children make their first communion especially if they are attending a Catholic school. It must be hard to stand up and say you don’t want your child to participate. As for letting children make their 1st communion so they can decide later on in life if they want to practice this religion why not let them do every custom attached to every religion then to give them a real choice!!!!

    How many couples getting married have not set foot in a church for years and wont after either the wedding either…..how many children have a church baptisim and dont go there again till 1st communion, then confirmation.

    #66498
    Ally23
    Member

    Hi all,

    After reading all your views….I think your all right as it is down to personal choice at end of the day.
    I am from englandand therefore my religion is Church of England, however my partner is Catholic. Neither of us are too religious, we have our own beliefs and that has always been good enough for me. But since having the little fella, I am starting to feel the pressure from his family. No one has yet to say it out loud to me yet but his mother wants our son to be christened asap. I have no objection to my son being christened, I want him to…but the other debate is what religion do we choose. The Mum in law has said catholic coz we are currently living in Ireland and there fore it will be easier for us to enrol our son in schools etc when the time comes……but I eel like my back is against the wall slightly coz who is to say we will still be living in Ireland when the time comes.
    But my point of view is why should we just choose a religion coz its convient, and he won’t feel let out when all his classmates are having their communion etc. His mum is very religious, and its so hard coz I don’t want to upset any member of his family.
    But we should choose a religion for our actual beliefs.

    I am christened and we always went to church at easter, harvest, christmas and this enough for me, and seeing as my partner doesn’t go to mass ands hasn’t done for years. who are we to preach when neither of\\ us practice?

    #66499
    Ally23
    Member

    Oh and I forgot to to say to LIbby1….well done. I praise you greatly for just asking about other peoples point of view on this……..as` recently I have found it a very Taboo converstion. It just seems to me sometimes that some of todays society have thier beliefs and are unable to accept and have any knowledge of a differnece. ( I am truely trying to say that in the nicest way possible)

    It is a very hard subject to talk about and religion will always be. But i find it so interesting to listen to other people’s feelings.

    #66500
    libby1
    Participant

    I see 53 people have viewed this question.

    I was reading "insane chat" and i was curious to other people’s views.

    Religion can be a taboo subject … But i believe that everyone has choice and rights . We all have boundaries and beliefs as well.

    Looking forward to ypur comments

    #66508
    yummymummy
    Member

    i just have to reply back!!

    by no means was i attacking your comment i simply replied with my point of view, i come on this site everyday and never have and never intend to have a row or upset anyone, a healthy debate is all it is so if you took me up wrong then im sorry.

    all i wanted to make the point of is its my choice not to go to mass but its also my choice to let ds make his first communion.

    went to mass on sunday morning (was a struggle getting up at 10.30 am i tell ya after being out the night b4) but it was a nice mass but ds did get bored and kept saying is this nearly over.
    if it was a childrens mass the priest didnt make it very entertaining.

    #66511
    ed1
    Participant

    I would not be a regular church goer but since my ds has made his 1st communion I do try to bring him every now and again.

    I do think though that if there were more masses aimed at children a lot more parents and kids would attend. Some of the priests go on and on during their homily that children do get bored and start acting up. I brought my 2 to mass in a church in drogheda (wont mention which one) and had to leave half way through as this elderly lady kept tutting and looking at my DS2 who was about 4 at the time, just because he would not sit still. This put me off bringing him.

    Our children are our future generation and if the church dont try to make mass more enjoyable for them now then i cant see many of them going to mass in the future.

    #66518
    Sabrinab 08
    Member

    I see Libby’s point and she’s not having a go, just makin the point and askin the question!! i think the reason ppl r taken offence is because the truth hurts. personally and it entirely my opinion that i would like to share and discuss but i dont see the point in having your child christened or make 1st communion if you think about it logically your making a promise to make them part of the catholic community on their christening day and it up to the parents to live up to this promise until as some others have stated they can decide for themselves as adults if they would like to continue with this religion. I just think its a wee bit pointless even goin to as baptism or christening if you have no intention of continuing to the process you have just started! its a complete waste of time, energy and most of all its confusing for your child/children if you continue stop/starting with christening…communon…confirmation!!! children learn what they live and continuity is the best way for them to learn!!

    #66520
    yummymummy
    Member

    i dont know if you are refering to me, but i certainly havent taken offence t anything that has been said!!!
    to each there own has always been my motto in life and will continue to stay like that.

    #66522
    Sabrinab 08
    Member

    Of cousre not referring to anyone. just my opinion, and agree with you. each to their own!! if everyone could stick with that we’d be laughing!! 😀 😀 religion always a touchy subject!

    #66524
    yummymummy
    Member

    too right sabrina!!!!
    always was and always will be touchy!

    Just on another note, the priest in mass on sunday was polish, fair play but then went into about 5mins of speaking polish, no one had a clue what he was saying!!!!! was there a need for this??
    now im all for different nationailtys living here but to speak polish at a catholic irish church??? am i alone on this train of thought??

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