Fear of Flying..

[happymumblemum]

Just back from a flight last night and I was as bad as ever..not sure what to do with my fear…I face it and I do it but I hate feeling like I am going to die every second of the flight..thankfully only 40 minutes.

I am like a crazy person talking to every one like mad and nearly ripped the womans shoulder off in front of me during take off ( I hold on to the chair back for grim death..cos the chair will really help me as we plummett to the ground )..I panic like mad when they switch the seat belt signs on mid flight and listen out for noises etc…

All this is done in with my dd completely unaware as I don’t want to pass on my fear..like I am smiling and chatting whilst gripping the seat back

It gets worse and worse with each passing flight..wouldn’t be as bad if dh was with me though.

Once plane is coming down for landing I am ok , landing doesn’t worry me once I can see the floor..and if it skidded of the run way I wouldn’t be particulary afraid its just the take off and climbing, and a little in the middle.
I push thoughts of exploding planes, concorde, twin towers and every single air crash investigation programme I have ever seen ( yeah I lap up that show I think at least its generally Zumba Zumba airlines where the roof rips off the plane or something not generally Ryan Air!!) outta my mind quite well actually, and I do breathing excerises.

This fear started when dd was born and has increased in severity all the time..I want to enjoy flying again ( well as much as you can on Ryan Air) and not feel like I have cheated death on landing.
Don’t want to go down the tablet route as I want to be fully aware for my dd ( and when the plane crashes I don’t wanna be zonked out and can’t drag my burning ass outta the seat )
Keep seeing a news reel item in my head as I wait in departures..tonight on RTE news a Ryan Air plane crashed on take off from Dublin airport and killed all 200 passengers
It doesnt even help when I read the in flight magazine and it said 7 million passengers flew last year on ryan air..I think well one’s gotta go down soon
Sorry for long ramble..am just typing as I am thinking really.
Just please HELP!!! I am rational and know the odds ..more chance being wiped out mowing the lawn etc etc but HELP

[happymumblemum]

I think flying Ryan air for so long has actually given me the fear too..I remember flying years ago in the jumbo’s and loving every second..

The stewards dont help either I remember last year saying to one steward why hadn’t we landed yet ( as I watched my clock ) and he said, in heavy Eastern European Accent, " I don’t know what’s wrong with the plane sorry" 😯 😯 😯 😆 😆 😆

[failte16]

Hi there,

I am a natural therapist and specialise in the Australian Bush Flower Essences, they are flower remedies similar to the Bach Flower Remedies and you can buy them in most chemists. I would recommend the Emergency Essence. Its pure and natural, no side effects and is specifically for distress, fear and panic. I have taken it myself plenty of times and it works very effectively. Have also given it to three separate clients for fear and panic to do with flying and they swear by it.

You can get them in nearly every chemist or health store. I also make them up and I’m based in Laytown. My no is 087 768 2738 if you are interested.

Hope this info has helped and flying becomes a more bearable venture.

Katie

[hjs]

Yes, can u/s that fear.

I fine when we fly as a 4, as I always was b4 kids – to be frank but not wishing to be morbid, I think I am thinking under those circumstaces if we all go down, then we r together so no prob (iykwim!), so the obv opp corelation when I flying alone (usually work-related) or if I only with dd or ds or v rarely dh, is self-evident. Perhaps that is somewhere where u fear coming from? Dunno?

A friend of mine who got progressively worse as she got older re flying did a fear of flying course at Manc airport (sure they r in every airport?) sid it improved her ability to fly calmly – not a cure, but a help. She said a lot of it was the thiong about being out of control when u "just" a passenger, and so going in cockpit, speaking to pilots, being explained to re the mechanisms of flying on this course helped her, but that they did also say (those running course) that each root cause(s) of the fear for an individual is diff, so such a course wouldn’t nec suit everyone.

Also, back to "conditioning", a person should be able to condition themselves to accept flying thru positive association, I think, am a bit hazy on this as of yet! Bet if you google faer of flying and classical/Pavlovian conditioning it might throw up some in terestin g info. Am just intrigued by this at the mo, sorry if sound like am banging on about it in lots of posts.

hth.

[yummymummy]

Dunno what to say to ya as Im not like that at all. I hate taking off and landing but people wouldnt even notice this in me at all.

My brother is terrible, he will have sleepness nights before flying, crapping himself the day off the flight etc and he swears by rescue remedy.

[Yvonne]

Thankfully I don’t have a fear of flying… have heard of someone who got hypnosis to help him fly…
Rescue remedy is great for calming yourself down too…

[happymumblemum]

Thanks for all the replies, I have tried Rescue Remedy in the past and it didn’t work..will try theother natural remedy that was suggested next time I fly …

I can really narrow it down to .

1.Lack of Control

2.The thought of something bad happening and my little dd being terrified and me being alone with her.
( I definately think like hjs said its worse alone with the kids and I defo don’t feel so afraid when dh is there too)

I will try the natural remedy next time and see how I get along.

[hjs]

God, this is shooting in the dark alright but re the something terrible, dd freaking out and u not being able to support her thing, I reckon u underestimate urself.

I think some sort of automatic piolt thing (pardon pun) would occur and u would be 1000000% focussed on reassuring her even tho u would know the real score uself. Don’t think u would be able to stop uself, maternal instinct taking over or whatever…

But am equally sure u would never be called upon to try!!!

[happymumblemum]

yikes even reading about this makes me feel sick….

Stopping watching Air Crash Investigation may help…you know my "favourite" one is where the plane roof rips off and they are like in a run away rollercoaster..oh my god..actually I think most of them survived. I would have died of shock though.

Definately will try this rescue stuff…

I hear what you are saying about the conditioning stuff..but bad things do happen..and its not natural to fly so maybe thats why we don’t have a natural fear of it cos we aint supposed to do it 😆

Oh and I check out every single passenge in departures and try and scope out a terrorist..you know the "profile" youngish..alone..foreign…and sadly its 80% of the fellas flying out of Leeds of all places 😆 😆

[hjs]

Yeah, fear of flying is a learnt, not innate reaction alright, even if u take into acount common ancestory with birds, we still don’t have wings so sure wouldn’t have in built fear of it.

Think the conditioning stuff is all about realigning (for that i read "kidding") your initial negative response to something with a definite positive one and over time u learn to "automatically have the positive raction 1st ( or something but am sure a lot more technical!)

Lol, try the drugs 1st, cheaper and quicker!!!

[beams]

Im not a great flyer either to be honest. I hate the take off and some parts of when we are in the air (ie when seat belt sign goes on and the bouncing gets bouncier 😯 ). I’ve had a few scares in the air – allweather related and i think since then the bouncing hasnt been too bad !!! Nothing like a good scare to put all your other flights into perspective. I put nice thoughts "out there" when i fly – ie. think happy thoughts 😆 😆 So far so good 😆 😆 and HMM STOP watching those air crash investigations – i did and its helped 😆 😆

[Taylor5]

i dont have a fear, would hang off a plane by my teeth… but we had a horrid flight a few years back and dh said he would never fly again…. and he hasnt. We went to the Slieve Russell in Cavan on our honeymoon, i would have LOVED a romantic beach holiday, but that wasnt going to happen……
My dh did say he is going to try, well im booking a sun holiday for the summer… its not fair on the boys, i have been paitent for so long but enough is enough, he had to face his fear and try something to sort it……. the irony of it, he has been working in the Airport for the past few years 🙄 😆 😆 😆 😆

[Yvonne]

DH always watches that Air crash investigation programme, I hate it!!! I know I don’t have a fear, but I worry when he is gone on a trip with work… so definitely stop watching them!

We were in the UK the other week, and I was sitting beside my Mam… she actually prays when she is landing, so the head went down and she had her hands blessed… and you know bump when you land, well I grabbed her and yelped, she lept about 10ft in the air!!!!! I’m sorry I know it was cruel but I couldn’t resist, I was pmsl laughing for ages afterwards… needless to say Mammy wasn’t! 😆 😆 😳

[Taylor5]

I love those programmes too…. yvonne thats terrible, your poor mother 😆 😆 😆 😆

[beams]

I say a prayer taking off too and bless us all 😆 😆 😆 Must be working coz we always land safely 😆 😆 😆

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