Breastfeeding in public

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  • #6409
    WHealth4Life
    Member

    Just wondering what your thoughts, concerns are regarding this topic. It’s been a controversial topic in the area where I grew up as recently in the local pub a mother was asked to move to an empty upstairs room (not used during the day-time), away from the lounge because she was breastfeeding her baby. It attracted a good bit of attention on Joe Duffy and I was dissapointed to read in the local newsletter where it was referred to as the "breastfeeding fiasco". I decided to write in a letter to support breastfeeding mothers in the area and to inform those who do not understand the practicalities of breastfeeding in modern Ireland. If anyone is interested I can post up the letter here so please let me know if you are interested. I can also provide an online link to the "Breastfeeding fiasco" letter if people are interested.

    #84130
    Taylor5
    Member

    I breastfed both my boys for a few months I got feeding bras and tops so i was fine feeding outdoors, would put a small sheet over his head so nobody would even notice…..
    I do remember 2 times one in Drogheda and one in Dundrum shopping centre that i felt that i would have been happier to sit in a toliet then where I was, both times we were having food and i got into a panic as in each case two older men were gawking at me and i couldnt latch the baby on….. other then that i never had any trouble and wouldnt have bothered where I was if my babies needed to be fed I’d feed them.
    i did attend a playgroup a while back and there was a breast feeding mother at it, God she was terrible she would wear all the wrong sort of clothes and would take he whole arm out of her clothes…. Im not joking I didnt know where to look half the time 😳 😳 😳 She would ALMOST strip off on the upper half, I was bf at the time and I found this sooo uncalled for. find its women who take it to this ott level that ruin it from everyone and they cause this type if negative backlash.
    I know my own mother felt a bit 😳 at first but she soon got used to it.

    #84148
    Bookwitch
    Member

    I totally support breastfeeding in public but I agree with Taylor that there are appropriate clothes to save everyone’s blushes and women should try to be discreet, but BF is natural and should be allowed in restaurants, shops etc and women should not be sent away as if they are doing something shameful

    #84158
    happymumblemum
    Participant

    God they are only breasts…they are foisted upon us in magazines , tv, everywhere..what is the big deal when a woman uses them for their correct purpose..I never understood this.

    I will never forget a breastfeeding video show to us in ante natal class where by it showed how" easy" it was to feed your baby out and about in public and this woman had ’em just hanging out…surprise surprise this video was made by Cow and Gate 🙄 . It nearly put me off trying to BFand I am sure that was the intention…

    I passionately advocate bf and I know how it has benifitted my dd health wise…was kind of sad that she had her 1st ever antibiotic this week( at the ripe old age of 6) for a tooth infection.

    I don’t think the numbers of bf women will ever increase here in Ireland or England, for many reasons ..none of which I would want to start arguments on a forum over. As it is a choice and that has to be respected.

    #84162
    Bookwitch
    Member

    What is this a mumstown first three replies to the topic and we all agree!!!! 😆

    #84166
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Worrying about wearing appropriate clothes, hiding other peoples blushes, hiding in toilets, putting a sheet over the child’s head is not what I’d called an enlightened attitude to breastfeeding.

    I breastfeed my child in public whenever necessary, no matter what I am wearing. To be honest, it is not all that difficult to be "discreet" once you get the hang of it and if you yourself actually see what you are doing as natural and no big deal. Modern fashions mean that a lot of cleavage is visible anyway and whilst breastfeeding, the nipple is NOT visible. I have never noticed anybody giving me any negative attitude and the very rare times where anybody stared, I just passed absolutely no remarks of them.

    I can honestly say that for me, it has been a normal and very pleasant part of my life. Indeed, whilst travelling on airplanes, breastfeeding has meant that I have always been able to keep my child quiet as the suckling action prevents sore ears and she therefore doesn’t cry. I have even had other passengers compliment me for this 🙂

    The more people who breastfeed in public, the more normal it will become.

    #84172
    Bookwitch
    Member

    I agree if more people see Breastfeeding in public it will become normal but a change in attitude in this country will take years

    #84178
    Taylor5
    Member

    I cant understand why more people dont bf, its SO EASY, itf free and the bond with your baby is priceless

    #84187
    CaliGal
    Member

    This really peeves me as it is actually illegal in Ireland and many places of the world actually, to ask a breastfeeding lady to move or stop.

    To see what your breastfeeding rights are in Ireland, look here:

    http://www.equality.ie/index.asp?locID=90&docID=586

    I don’t see why people are so darn uptight about breastfeeding in public. To be honest I am offended more by seeing all the flabby bellies in too short tops and unfit bodies when temperatures go above 15 degrees!

    #84192
    Corinne9
    Member

    I’d be interested to read that letter you referred to. That would be a good thing to post.

    There seem to be interesting dynamics in Ireland and in the U.K. re breastfeeding and bottle-feeding, with both ‘sides’ seeming to have to defend their position! But that’s just an observation, and, another topic.

    Re breastfeeding in public, I’ve also found it mostly easy. People may be embarrassed (and not know where to look, etc.) but that’s understandable as it’s not anymore a breastfeeding culture (apparently the breastfeeding culture got ‘erased’ in the past couple of generations). I agree that as more mothers breastfeed in public, it will gradually become a natural part of the culture again.

    Another sensitive topic is breastfeeding a child when it’s already walking. 🙂 That’s a No-No for some people. Although I didn’t plan to breastfeed until my child is already a toddler, I’ve found that the baby I nursed is now a toddler and we haven’t weaned yet! I don’t care that much though (about what people may say) – I find that my attitude is a quiet confidence that it is ok, that it is good for my child and it is my decision. But I do make allowances for people – like I sometimes move to a quiet room if I’m in a house where there is an older person who might be offended. I WILL do what I feel is best but I don’t believe I have to cause a big revolution doing it. The revolution is in the doing – I seem to have the feeling that we don’t have to convince or fight people who are already convinced otherwise. Only we mustn’t let them affect us.

    #84194
    hjs
    Member

    Breast feeding in public is fine – who’s business is it how anyone else feeds their baby after all?

    Which means i have to be consistent and acknowledge a related issue that does bother me…

    The same support afforded to mothers breast feeding in public ought to go for bottle feeding mothers too – they have made their choice for whatever reason and that ought to be equally respected. In the same way that no-one would want any third party to be critical over a mother breast feeding her child in public, bottle feeding mothers ought to be afforded that equal respect because, again, it’s no-one else’s business how a mother feeds her child except hers and her partner’s .

    Taylor – "I cant understand why more people dont bf, its SO EASY, itf free and the bond with your baby is priceless". The point is that often, yes, but not always, hence my feelings as outlined above. It’s not always the case, for plenty of reasons. You can have a priceless bond with your baby if you don’t breastfeed. A quote from La Leche I have saying otherwise, that "comfort and closeness that only breastfeeding can provide" I feel is quite insulting to women who are bottle feeding, I feel.

    So, back to the thread more purposefully. Is there any value in trying to broaden the cultural understanding of feeding to accept not just tha a woman breast feeds in public, but that however she feeds, she should be supported in having made a personal choice for her and her family?

    #84195
    Taylor5
    Member

    Girls when I said about that girl who bf, im not joking she took most of her clothes off she would have her WHOLE BOOB out in the fresh air, she would feed and wind for about 5 mins all this time semi naked, as a breast feeding mum myself i thought it ott……

    My mam did say she seen a child who was in a school uniform (so 4 or older) walk up to its mum in the playground and nuzzel in for a sip of booby!!!!! Mam did think this was a bit too old, well too old to be doing in a playground, fine if its a comfort thing in your own home, once they have a full set of teeth is too old for me 😆

    #84196
    twinkle07
    Member

    I have to say i agree wit u all, i think woman who breastfeed are great i tried it with my ds but it jus didn work for me for many reasons but i would definetely try again with next baby.I use to work in shoe shop and it had a kids department and alot of woman would come in and sit dwn just to feed their babies, and all the staff would just go on as normal.I myself wouldn feel comfortable bf in public but i dnt even feel comfortable wearing low cut tops.And as happymumblemum said there in mags,tv etc if u put a topless picture beside a picture of bf her baby in my opinion the woman feeding her baby is so much more attractive and natural.

    #84201
    scole1
    Member

    well here’s my view it’s sort of mixed to be honest…..
    i have to say fair play to women who breast feed, i did for 4 days (had complications after the birth) so the bottle came in….anyway i think women who breast feed are great that they do that, yes in this society it’s still taboo most of the time….i too sometimes feel a little uncomfortable when talking to people who are breastfeeding, i suppose not that i’m looking or afraid i’d see the bot s and bobs like i have attached but i wonder does the mother who’s breast feeding feel uncomfortable at time? do they have in their head what does that person think etc etc….so i often have that in my head thinking i think what they are doing is acceptable or unaacpectable? that’s what goes through my head, but i have no problem with people breast feeding it’s natural….
    i do sometimes have problems with people who push the whole breast feeding to people who don’t breast feed…it’s a very personal choice so sometimes people force the bottel feeding on others and some force the breast feeding idea on others, bot of which is someone’s decision and should not be forced to this or that or opinion on it…..i remember when i was deciding whether or not to breast feed on ds2, and it was said by a few, oh you should try to breast feed this time round since last time you weren’t well and you should try this time…i this time didn’t want to as i knew i was having a section and thought well the last time i was adiment that i was breast feeding and it didn’t work, i was very very upset and felt i had let my child down by not being able to breast feed…anyway took awhile to get over being over sensitive, anyway this time round i was told you should do it, i said no not going to going to see how i am as i knwo how i was mentally upset the last time..and i knew i would need help this time…but the idea was forced on me no matter what i said, so i decided just to say yeah whatever, anyway i eneded up bottle feeding, however did try ds2 on the boob and he would have sucked the leg off a donkey but i felt mentally and phisically i should just stick to bottles…(thankfully i did as my iron is very very low and i think i would have been in bits, wrecked as is bottle feeding god fobid how i would have been breast feeding)
    something that i was initially made to feel guilty about coz of comments, but then thought no it’s my choice my child i’ll do what i like…
    so for me it’s everyone’s choice to breast feed or bottle feed and like hjs said every mother can get that special bond regardless…
    regards feeding in public why not, why should a baby be forced to be fed in a toilet…to people with an attitude like this regardless of bottle feeding or breast woukld you have your dinner in a toilet??

    #84210
    chewieodie
    Participant

    Well…. I bf both of mine…. and although it was the best choice for me…. I agree that it is a personal decison per family, per child…. nobody should have the right to belittle anyone for the choices that they make.
    I found the bf very easy…. okay, hell initially, but it worked for us…. and I was able to bf where and when was necessary, be that on a park bench, a bus, a restuarant…. hey, anywhere I needed to. And I always ensured that I was covered up, so as not to embarrass others, or myself for that matter. And I’m not a particularly shy person… 🙄

    My first was 9months when he decided that enough was enough…. but DD…. she was 18months when she weaned totally…. granted, after a year, it was just a night feed… but hey! So, I basically feel, what works for you, works for you, for your own reasons, and you shouldn’t feel pressure to do one of the other…. at the end of the day, you’ll spend the rest of your child’s life feeling pressure of some sort! You, as a mother, know what you are comfortable with.

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